NOW READING How to DIY the Penis Facial at Home — and No, It’s Not What You Think 🙈
July 9, 2018

How to DIY the Penis Facial at Home — and No, It’s Not What You Think 🙈

You must’ve heard of the penis facial taking Hollywood and the beautysphere by storm. If you haven’t — or even if you have — read on because our intrepid contributing editor Coco is going to tell you how you can do a DIY penis facial at home — no foreskin needed!


 

I’m a self-professed skincare daredevil. If I catch wind of something that sounds crazy, I immediately want in. If money were no object, I’d be flying to exotic locales in search of the newest and most bizarre thing to rub on my face like some sort of deranged Marco Polo. Unfortunately, money is very much an object for me — a giant immovable object — but I’ll be damned if I let it stand in the way of all the skincare fun I want to have. Sometimes a girl has got to improvise, and when I saw the world buzzing about “penis facials,” I knew nothing was going to get between me and some good D. You know, D, as in decisions, as in great skincare decisions. C’mon, get your mind out of the gutter (JK, leave it there, it’s where I dwell).

 

 

So let’s delve into the whole DIY penis facial thing. The magic behind the penis facial is essentially Korean newborn baby foreskin, or more accurately and specifically, the epidermal growth factor (EGF) in the human fibroblasts obtained from Korean newborn baby foreskin (hence its name — this fact is not lost on me every time I change my sweet Korean son’s diaper). But worry not, EGF is lab grown, cloned from a single donor. There’s no underground Korean foreskin factory, although that sounds like a reality show from the not-too-distant future so don’t give anyone any ideas.

 

If you’re wondering exactly why celebrities and skincare enthusiasts are going nuts (haaaa) over the penis facial, it’s because of the supposed benefits of the EGF. From what I’ve gathered, growth factors communicate with your skin cells and give them a big metaphorical pep talk. Basically they coax your skin cells into working at peak capacity. Your body uses EGF to repair itself from wounds, and in some clinical trials it’s been shown to reverse aging. All in all, it’s a promising new topical skin treatment, which is why I’m so hellbent on giving it a try myself.

 

So how am I going to do this? I really, really want to try one of these peen sessions. This facial has been praised by ageless vampire beauties like Cate Blanchett and Sandra Bullock; I’m just a lowly nobody. As much as I wish I had the clout to do so, I can’t exactly jet out to NYC to get one of these things on a whim. I also don’t have the $650 to spare for each session.

 

But then a lightbulb went off. “Wait a minute,” I thought. “I know for a fact we carry EGF and FGF products at Beautytap.” The little hamster wheels in my brain started turning. “We also carry the aptly named, snazzy little Swanicoco Coco Roller with the needles!” I can do this at home! Not only can I have my own DIY penis facial at home, I can do it every damn night if I want to! I don’t have to settle for the one-off or every once in a while penis facial — it’s gonna be all penis all the time at Maison Du Coco!

 

penis facial
istock/Neeila

 

How to DIY the penis facial

 

The original penis facial starts with what you’re probably already doing at home: a nice double cleanse. I’ll be starting with the Tony Moly Pro Clean Soft Sherbet Cleanser. I like to do a sherbet cleanser when I’m going ham on the sunscreen like I have been this summer. I know some people are concerned with mineral oil as an ingredient, but it’s totally safe and way too big to get in and clog pores. I find it’s an excellent ingredient for first cleansers as it really breaks down the crap on your face without stripping!

 

While your face is lubricated with oil, I suggest doing a self facial massage as I’ve read that that’s what they do for you during the $650 version of this facial. It’s a lovely treat for both your skin and your circulation/lymphatic system. Next I’ll follow up with Innisfree Blueberry Rebalancing 5.5 Cleanser, as it’s a damn good cleanser that does all the right things at the right pH and great for your wallet.

 

penis facial
istock

 

Once the skin is nice and clean, I’ll follow up with my favorite toner, SanDaWha Liposome Skin Softener. Depending on how my skin is doing that day, I’ll do two to three light layers applied with a high quality cotton pad, just like an esthetician giving a professional facial would.

 

Now here comes the real sauce and what really makes this DIY profesh AF. We’re going to do the same microneedling technique they use in-house for the official penis facial, but instead we’re going to use the Swanicoco Coco Roller. I must say, I’m quite needle-phobic, but I’m also willing to do whatever it takes to get the best results, and microneedling is where it’s at. The theory behind needle rolling is that the microscopic pin pricks will kick your skin into beast mode, promoting healing and collagen production while allowing your specialized treatments to really get into the skin and do their thing on a deeper level. Whether that’s true or not, there’s a chorus of voices online from women who love the results they’ve gotten from these little torture devices. I hear it’s quite painless overall but that you can always slap a little lidocaine lotion on first to numb the area. I won’t be doing that because I don’t want anything to interfere with my precious serum, the pièce de résistance: the Swanicoco EGF 10ppm Pure Ampoule. If you listen closely you can hear trumpets playing from heaven whenever you say its name.

 

What makes a penis facial well, a penis facial is EGF, and it’s available right here at Beautytap. In fact, the Swanicoco EGF 10ppm Pure Ampoule contains 99% (or 10 parts per million) pure EGF! So we’re talkin’ primo levels of EGF goodness here, folks.

 

But where does that EGF come from …

 

Now if you’ve come this far and you’re so completely done with the idea of foreskin cells in your skincare, ethically harvested or not, but you’re still dying to get the benefits, I have some great news for you.

penis facial

I called upon Beautytap’s Jude Chao to try to find out exactly where Swanicoco’s EGF is sourced from, and we got some rather shocking (or relieving) news, depending on where you stand. It turns out Swanicoco’s EGF is completely peen-free! The EGF is cultivated from colon bacillus from the intestinal tracts of vertebrate animals. Jude emailed me to let me know her source at Swanicoco said, “it’s usually hamster or pig, but that the animal isn’t hurt at all by getting the bacillus.”

 

The EGF found in this particular serum, rh-oligopeptide-1, is “a recombinant human epidermal growth factor consisting of a single chain protein with a maximum of 53 amino acids.” I mean, sign me up regardless — I am still on board this increasingly less crazy train.

 

There is some debate out there about the true efficacy of EGF, some arguing that once the cell is dead it can no longer promote growth and healing, but others sing its praises and talk about the tangible results they see in their skin, the famous penis facial enthusiasts included. Even if it turns out stem cell EGF doesn’t quite provide everything its proponents swear by, Swanicoco’s EGF serum is still a wonderful product made up of tocopheral (vitamin E), an excellent antioxidant, and allantoin, a great anti-inflammatory. You’re definitely not doing anything harmful to your skin by using it; in fact you’re at the very least treating it to a lovely antioxidant boost. Couple that with the great care of a double cleanse, massage, and dermaroller microneedling session and I’m willing to bet we’re all going to walk away from this Penisperience (trademark) glowing like we just got done with the other kind of D session. The best part is, we saved at least $400, the price of a NYC plane ticket, and we did it 100% sans penis! Which is the last time I’m ever going to get excited doing something sans penis.

 

Would you ever try a penis facial? What about microneedling? Do you think the results would be worth it?

 

 

Coco Park is an author, beauty journalist, blogger, podcast host, and all around oddball living in Montreal Quebec with her family. Originally from the southern USA, she worked for several years in the makeup industry as a professional makeup artist and holds a certificate in esthetics. She is a proud member of the Choctaw Nation of Oklahoma. Want to know more? Check her out on the Beauty Beyond Basics podcast, on her blog TheBeautyWolf.com, on Instagram @thebeautywolf, and in her book "Korean Beauty Secrets: A Practical Guide to Cutting-Edge Skincare & Makeup."

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COMMENTS 7

sanderson

This is the most iconic article I've ever read!!!!

Now please excuse me while I try to calm down LMAO

kimmy

"it’s gonna be all penis all the time at Maison Du Coco!" OMFG I'm cry-laughing so hard. But I'm glad no actual peen is involved, and even more glad that no animals get harmed in the process of getting the good ingredients.
I've seen a lot about micro-needling recently, seems to be quite the hype-train. I'd love to try it out myself one day, despite my aversion to needles. Maybe if the daily tap offers a discount on the roller or the Swanicoco Ampoule sometime. Does anyone know if there's an age that's considered "too young" to do this? It seems... Read more

annapark

I feel like just like Botox and retinoids used to be considered for mature skin but now everyone in their 20s is doing it, microneedling is probably gonna open up to all ages if it actually starts to gain some traction and people start seeing results. In Korea, I saw lots of patches and masks with little sharp "pyramids" that are supposed to infuse ingredients deeper into your skin.

kimmy

It sounds so scary, but if it's good for my skin I'm game :D

annapark

As someone with big pores, I'm unreasonably scared of microneedling. I know it has nothing to do with pore size, but the thought of littering my skin with thousands of micro-punctures freaks me out hahaha!

I'd love to know from people who've tried microneedling what it was really like and if the results are worth it!

nicelady

Yes! And I don’t fear needles, but I fear introduction of bacteria. But the thought of getting even more mileage out of the benefits of skincare has me thinking about it.

annapark

Oh yeah, you've gotta go somewhere with high cleanliness standards. I didn't even think of bacteria ... ewww! I'm always so curious about these new techniques, but I'm such a chicken to try them out myself until they've been truly tried and tested.

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